Kinship Center realizes the complexity of today’s adoption…even with the growing trend toward open adoption adoption remains a very serious and grief filled option for birth parents…if an adoption must take place birth parents and adoptive parents should strive to have a healthy open adoption and work with professionals who can educate and support the building of true relationships between birth and adoptive families over a life time…Historically Kinship Center has always promoted open adoption and has pioneered these relationships by educating both adoptive and birth families to the benefits of openness as well as negotiating the challenges that come with openness….It’s gratifying to see this stance being supported in a recent study published by the Evan B Donaldson Adoption Institute…the report shows how dramatically infant adoption has changed over the decades and that adoptions are trending toward openness… click below to link to the study and if you are pregnant and considering open adoption as an option hopefully the study will give you some added peace of mind to know that open adoption is becoming the norm in infant adoptions…
http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/research/2012_03_openness.php
Once there were two women who never knew each other.
One you do not remember, the other you call Mother.
One you do not remember, the other you call Mother.
Two different lives shaped to make you one.
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.
The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love. The second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality. The other gave you a name.
One gave you a talent. The other gave you aim.
One gave you emotions. The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile. The other dried your tears.
One sought for you a home that she could not provide.
The other prayed for a child and her hope was not denied.
And now you ask me, through your tears,
the age-old question unanswered through the years.
Heredity or environment, which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling. Neither. Just two different kinds of Love.
© Author Unknown
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It is so rare that we honestly hear from birth fathers about their experience of placing a child for adoption…I have been privileged to meet many wonderful men through the years who came forward to plan for their children’s future through the adoption but still it breaks my heart to think of all the birth fathers who have been shut out of the process or felt they had no choice or say in the adoption planning of their child…It was refreshing to find this YouTube video of a birth father speaking about his life long journey of making sense of the adoption of his infant son…He speaks candidly and clearly dispels the myth about birth fathers not caring about their child placed for adoption…
It is the responsibility of adoption professionals to provide honest information to women considering adoption about grief and loss issues that they will confront if they choose to place a child for adoption…adoption can be a good option ,but it must be well thought out…the more information , education, preparation and support a woman can have will aid her in preparing for the emotional journey she will inevitably confront as a birth parent…to minimize these issues and feelings or to not provide birth parents with tools to deal with grief and loss is wrong and deceptive…birth parent peer support is very important…who better than a birth mother who has walked the walk of adoption to aid and educate other women who might be considering adoption…I found this honest look at grief and loss issues told to a therapist by a birth mother who chose to place her baby for adoption 11 years ago.. she speaks honestly about her journey and although she has no regrets regarding her decision to place she speaks honestly about her grief and the ongoing resolution of her feelings….click below to link to this honest look at adoption…I’ve also posted another link to to a powerful resource for birth mothers,,Brenda Romanchik’s web site Open Adoption Insight…Brenda is a birth mother and has written extensively and honestly about grief and loss issues ..check out her pocket guides ..she’s published four of them… the one on grief is outstanding I often recommend it and use it in my work with birth parents…
Unplanned pregnancy? Wondering if adoption might be the right option for you? Are you confused with a number of questions? Are you looking for help and answers ? What about closed vs. open adoption ? Is it harder to have an open adoption? I’ve often heard that question being asked from young women and men when they first come to Kinship Center to explore adoption…. they often fear openness would be harder to handle than a closed adoption… A recent study conducted by the University of Texas finds just the opposite…..Researchers studied a total of 721 individuals, including birth mothers, adoptive parents and adopted children and adolescents from 1987 to 2000…their research concluded that for most birth mothers the more openness they had in the adoption the greater their satisfaction was with the adoption as well as lower levels of grief and more satisfaction with their role as birthmother in relationship to their adopted child… open adoption is not without its challenges it takes courage and commitment to stay present and involved in your child’s life and it takes courage and maturity to develop a solid and loving relationship with the adoptive parents…building a relationship takes time and often support is needed to navigate the waters of open adoption …Kinship Center can help you explore your choices regarding the type of adoption that is important to you ..It’s your choice… click link below to see a synopsis of the University of Texas study.. and if you think we can help you with your adoption plan contact Kinship Center at http://www.pregnantwhatdoido.com
I found this step by step guidebook to help a woman confronted with an unplanned pregnancy explore feelings and options…the information is straight forward and every option is explored…this is a great starting point and may help to bring clarity and answers to what may seem to be an overwhelming and scary situation…click below to link for a free down load of this workbook that may help to clear the confusion and fear you are experiencing regarding your pregnancy… Kinship Center is a private non profit child welfare agency dedicated to helping woman explore their options in a caring and non judgemental atmosphere call to speak to one of our experienced counselors… toll free 1888 466 6693…could your heart be open to adoption…view available adoptive parent photos and biographies at… http://www.pregnantwhatdoido.com …..also be sure to download the pregnancy options workbook
Love this you tube clip of birth mother and birth father sharing their reaction to visiting for the first time with their infant son they placed for adoption…nice to have a perspective from a birth father ..hats off to this newly formed family through open adoption for having the courage to record their reactions ….what a wonderful way for this baby to know how loved he is by both his birth and adoptive family… also for him to have honest information to better understand why he was placed for adoption and a vehicle to openly deal with the grief and loss issues that adoptees, birth parents and adoptive parents feel as they live their lives through a “relationship built open adoption”… click below to link to “Sawyer meets his birth parents”
Kinship Center has over 28 years experience helping woman throughout California to look at their options regarding an unplanned pregnancy…our counselors are here to help you… not to judge you or tell you what to do…services are free and confidential…adoption can be an option but its a big step and needs to be well thought out… you have choices and your decisions must be heard and respected…. adoption has life altering consequences and is not simple..finding people to trust who will help you explore your reasons and help you to find the answers to your questions is critical…Kinship Center counselors are here to help you…link below to some frequently asked questions as well as real stories from woman who worked with us… also explore our parent profiles of couples waiting to adopt… contact us toll free at 1-888-466-6693
http://www.pregnantwhatdoido.com/real-stories/
I came across this YouTube clip of a birth mother being interviewed by the adoptive family she choose to raise her infant..the interview is down to earth and the birth mother is genuine in her responses to difficult questions…I also love that during the interview she is holding her birth son…
click the link below to see this insightful diary…
