Monthly Archive for March, 2012

Adoption Poem

Once there were two women who never knew each other.
One you do not remember, the other you call Mother.

Two different lives shaped to make you one.
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.

The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love. The second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality. The other gave you a name.
One gave you a talent. The other gave you aim.

One gave you emotions. The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile. The other dried your tears.

One sought for you a home that she could not provide.
The other prayed for a child and her hope was not denied.

And now you ask me, through your tears,
the age-old question unanswered through the years.

Heredity or environment, which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling. Neither. Just two different kinds of Love.

© Author Unknown


A Birth Father’s Story….

It is so rare that we honestly hear from birth fathers about their experience of placing a child for adoption…I have been privileged to meet many wonderful men through the years who came forward to plan for their children’s future through the adoption but still it breaks my heart to think of all the birth fathers who have been shut out of the process or felt they had no choice or say in the adoption planning of their child…It was refreshing to find this YouTube video of a birth father speaking about his life long journey of making sense of the adoption of his infant son…He speaks candidly and clearly dispels the myth about birth fathers not caring about their child placed for adoption…

Birthparent’s grief and loss…an honest look…

It is the responsibility of adoption professionals to provide honest information to women considering adoption about grief and loss issues that they will confront if they choose to place a child for adoption…adoption can be a good option ,but it must be well thought out…the more information , education, preparation and support a woman can have will aid her in preparing for the emotional journey she will inevitably confront as a birth parent…to minimize these issues and feelings or to not provide birth parents with tools to deal with grief and loss is wrong and deceptive…birth parent peer support is very important…who better than a birth mother who has walked the walk of adoption to aid and educate other women who might be considering adoption…I found this honest look at grief and loss issues told to a therapist by a birth mother who chose to place her baby for adoption 11 years ago.. she speaks honestly about her journey and although she has no regrets regarding her decision to place she speaks honestly about her grief and the ongoing resolution of her feelings….click below to link to this honest look at adoption…I’ve also posted another link to to a powerful resource for birth mothers,,Brenda Romanchik’s web site Open Adoption Insight…Brenda is a birth mother and has written extensively and honestly about grief and loss issues ..check out her pocket guides ..she’s published four of them… the one on grief is outstanding I often recommend it and use it in my work with birth parents…